It’s a question we ask ourselves nearly every day – not so much because we worry about the breadth of our posterior parts (though this is never far from our minds), but because we’ve all been around the drinks business long enough to know that a glass of wine is never just a few ounces of something fruity and alcoholic. Not a bit.
Like all consumables, wine has semantic value – which is just another way of saying that we use it to make statements about who we think we are and how we would like to be perceived, regarded, and generally thought of by others.
Among the things that define us, drink isn’t a big player like dress or speech patterns. It’s more like an accessory. But let’s not fool ourselves about just how powerful a supporting role it can play. Just think about how James Bond’s vodka martini — shaken, not stirred — became a defining feature of one of the world’s most recognized personalities.
Keen to impersonate a Master of the Universe-grade investment banker? You’ll need to suit up in Armani and Rolex, but to really nail it you’ll want to order the resto’s last three bottles of Napa Valley cult cabernet at dinner that night – price be damned. Got an itch to go all Brooklyn on us? A lumberjack shirt and a good growth of Civil War-era facial hair are good starts, but don’t neglect to bone up on single estate sherries and murky Ribolla Gialla from Slovenia, otherwise there’s a good chance you’ll give yourself away. Hipster is as hipster does.
Wine can make your butt look big but it can also make it look small, arty, athletic, super cool or convincingly square. I’m pretty sure it’s just this that’s at the heart of the anxiety one encounters in a wine shop from time to time. Buyers want a pleasing bottle, but they’re wary of serving something that reflects a persona they aren’t comfortable inhabiting. Will this wine make me look like a newbie? A poser? A snob? A geek? Or will it project something more positive: urbanity; generosity; warmth; elegance; charm?
Wine helps us present ourselves as we wish to be seen. It helps others figure out who we are. And if we occasionally worry that there’s some distance between who we are and who we’d like to be, remember that presenting ourselves with confidence is the key to convincing people (including ourselves) that we’re the same inside as out.